Paul Savage

Comedian, host, cartoonist, astronaut, occasional liar

8 inexplicable rap, pop, or rock records by Football players

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Football players aren’t like you and me. They’re young, rich, famous, generally uneducated and spend maybe two hours a day training at most. How are you going to fill those long afternoons? By recording your own records, obviously.

1: Hoddle and Waddle

Glenn Hoddle and Chris Waddle were players at Tottenham Hotspur, very possibly the only sports team in the world named after a minor Shakespeare character, because football is occasionally classy as shit.

They were also playing together for the English national side, who at that time had a reputation for prodigious drinking and hellraising, which is strange as they then made this record, with them dressed as Chandler in a flashback episode of Friends. This performance is on “Top of The Pops”, which had allowed acts to mime to a backing track. You can clearly see at several points where Chris Waddle is so ashamed he forgets to mime along.

After this, Glenn Hoddle went on to manage England, where he was fired for saying disabled people had done someth